Tuesday, June 16, 2020

A Love Letter to Paige Bueckers and the Class of 2020

Dear Paige and Dear Members of the Class of 2020,

First of all, congratulations to every member of the class of 2020 on the completion of your high school careers. You of all classes undoubtedly appreciate the magnitude of your accomplishment because it has occurred under such strange and historic circumstances. And, being honest, you will all face harder challenges in the years to come. But, heck, you've spent 12 years on this quest and you've passed a lot of gates to get where you are today.

But, what's even more important than where you've been is where you're going. If you have indeed had a successful high school career, the proof of that someday will be that you will still have lifelong friends with whom you've shared this journey.

Hopefully, where you're going in future years will be filled with such friends. Unfortunately, you may also experience another pandemic like the coronavirus. But, hopefully, what you will not see is another event like the killing of George Floyd and the riots and mayhem that we have had on our streets. But, this will indeed be a harder challenge than surviving high school.

So, let me specifically thank and congratulate Paige Bueckers on a truly beautiful commentary published in the Star Tribune on Sunday June 7. If you haven't seen it, hopefully you can still find it online. It suggests to me that Paige is as good of a person as she is a basketball player. And, by the way, I also have every faith and belief that most members of the class of 2020 would agree with the things that Paige articulated. "Never take the little things for granted." Whatever you've lost, "it is so important to think of others." Concerning the death of George Floyd, she said, "When will people of color stop being judged by their skin? I am white. I will never be able to understand what it's like to be a person of color, but that does not make me any less angry.... There is a need for action instead of words. Something good just has to come out of this." Wise words even for a person who has successfully navigated their K-12 education.

But, I repeat: This will be a harder challenge than what you've faced so far, maybe the hardest challenge of your life. I hope you will pardon the expression, but when I was your age, the civil rights movement came in a sense to an end. The Civil Rights Act and the Voting Rights Act were passed by the U.S. Congress. We really thought that a new day had dawned. It turned out that the real beauty of the civil rights movement was that it shamed the racists and drove them underground. It was no longer acceptable to do and say racist things in public. Well, this lasted a good long while. But, after some 40 years, it suddenly became acceptable to be racist again. For every Paige Bueckers, there's a fellow like the one I read about in the Star Tribune the Sunday after Paige's commentary.  He owns the bar in Sauk Rapids, and it's filled with Confederate paraphernalia. It turns out that he actually spent 90 days in jail for deliberately running down a black man in his pickup truck. 90 days!

Then, in 1968, when I graduated from high school, the Vietnam War was raging. We all marched in the streets against the war and against a militaristic approach to our relations with foreign countries. And, you know, until 2001 if felt like we had made progress there as well. But, the fact is that the U.S. government abolished the military draft in 1973 and, no longer faced with the possibility of being sent to Vietnam against our will, we abandoned the fight. We decided to go about our business of getting jobs, getting married, having families.... We took our eye off the ball, and now we've gone back to a future where we deal with foreign countries mostly by virtue of our military.

The fact is that my generation, the Baby Boomers, have presided over a disastrous period in American life in which racism, inequality and militarism have expanded exponentially. Why? Well, because not all Baby Boomers believed is equality and peace, and the other guys were stronger and richer and smarter and had a lot more money than "we" did, those of us who marched for equality and peace. And, so, they won, and "we" lost.

So, Paige, don't underestimate the magnitude of the fight that you have outlined. Action, not words. Something good just has to come out of this. Paige and the class of 2020, don't be like us Baby Boomers because something good won't come out of this unless you really mean what you say, and you continue to mean what you said, year after year after year, unless you keep your eye on the ball, and unless you never ever underestimate your peers who don't share your perspective, who think that racism and violence are OK. My generation really meant it when we demanded peace and equality. We just didn't have the heart for the fight. And, we lost.

God bless everyone in the class of 2020 who wishes to bring peace and equality to all of your friends and neighbors and all Americans.

Sunny


Friday, June 5, 2020

St. Thomas Finally Movin' On Up

Wow, is it really 6, almost 7 years ago now that I wrote about St. Thomas' domination of the MIAC and its potential to move into a more competitive environment? Yes, it was. Amazing. So, it was 6.5 years after what an anonymous commenter said was a "great article, great insight" that St. Thomas is now looking to move up to D1.

My conclusion 6.5 years ago was in 2 parts:

1. "One's sense of fair play is somewhat offended by the Tommies superiority over its day to day opponents in the MIAC." This was based on, as I reported, at that time:

• 31 men's basketball titles (#1 all-time), 7 straight  and 71-3 record over 6 years
• 13 women's basketball titles (tied #1) (which have since increased to 8 of 9)

Plus:

Men's Sports

• 31 baseball titles (#1) including 9 straight
• 24 cross-country titles (#1)
• 28 ice hockey titles (#1)
• 27 indoor track titles (#1, in fact, that was 27 out of 27 since the sport was initiated)
• 29 outdoor track titles (#1) including 24 of the past 29
• 16 football titles (#4) but 3 in a row
• 9 golf titles (#4)
• 10 swimming titles (#4)
• 6 soccer titles (#4)
• 9 tennis titles (#7)

Women's Sports

• 15 cross-country titles (#1)
• 24 indoor track titles (#1) including 12 in a row and 24 of 27 overall
• 27 outdoor track titles (#1) including 7 in a row and 27 of 30
• 16 softball titles (#1) with 10 of the past 12
• 8 golf titles (#2)
• 2 hockey titles (#2)
• 1 tennis title (#3)
• 4 soccer titles (#4)
• No swimming titles

Again, this was where things stood in January 2013, and it is likely that if I totaled up 2013-2019, the disparity between St. Thomas and the rest of the MIAC would be worse.

But 2. I also concluded that, considering enrollments and endowment funds, "it is almost impossible to construct an alternative model wherein it makes sense for St. Thomas to be in D1 or D2." The point was (and is) that there are virtually no private schools of St. Thomas' size and wealth (their endowment fund at that time was $335 million) that plays football and everything else in D1, or even in D2.

Now, it's true that that statement was based on the assumption that St. Thomas wanted to play football, which assumption looks very much to be correct. Because as St. Thomas prepares for the possibility of moving up to D1, football remains very much a part of the planning.

But, before we talk about the future, let's talk about the past--that is, the recent past, wherein the MIAC, well, what? They didn't really kick St. Thomas out, as was widely reported, at least not technically, though, on the other hand, if St. Thomas hadn't resigned, at least seven other schools had said they would have left and the MIAC would have died an ignominious death. So the Tommies did the only decent thing they could do and they left, well, not voluntarily, but they left.

Yer Out

In any event, St. Thomas is out of the MIAC. As I said, at least 7 schools (and maybe 9) said they would quit the MIAC if St. Thomas stayed in. Those reportedly were St. Olaf, Hamline, Augsburg, Carleton, Macalester, St. Mary's and St. Kate's--and Gustavus and Concordia were on the fence but might have joined the exodus. So, at that point, St. Thomas did the right thing and left sort of voluntarily though they announced that it was involuntary, but anyway you get the point. It was involuntary until it was voluntary.

There's a rumor that people love underdogs, but I don't think that's true. People love a winner. And, so, in this circumstance, everybody loves St. Thomas and most everybody was madder than hell at the MIAC. Pat Borzi, writing in MinnPost, wrote that "the MIAC damaged itself....the MIAC will be known as the conference that kicked out a founding school for winning too much." Bob Collins at MPR wrote, "It's not the fault of St. Thomas...that some MIAC football programs are terminally lousy.... It's a bad look for (the) MIAC." (Wow, I thought MPR was nice people! Collins must be a Tommie!) "All St. Thomas did was be really good at sports, and also be a school that people wanted to attend." (Yeah, definitely a Tommie!)

Of course, there was the little matter of Tommies football coach Glenn Caruso running up scores, like 84-0 over Hamline and 97-0 over St. Olaf, a game in which the Tommies went for it on 4th down 5 times and got a 1st down all 5 times. Oh, and went for a 2-point conversion in the 4th quarter. When you're up 64-0 at the half, you're not supposed to pull shit like that, right?

But, there was more complaining the day St. Thomas got sacked than the day they won 97-0, at least in the Twin Cities media. Jock cliches filled the air. The other MIAC schools were "cowards." If you can't beat 'em, you just gotta get better. Chip Scoggins, not content to rip the MIAC in his own columns in the StarTrib, had to piggyback a comment on Collins' MPR rant. "The MIAC schools who forced this outcome should be embarrassed."

Well, I once said St. Thomas should stay in D3, but now, frankly, I have to say that the fellows who ought to be embarrassed are those who seem to think that colleges are just places that sponsor athletic teams. And, now, I'll add, yes, it's too bad the MIAC kicked St. Thomas out. It's too bad St. Thomas didn't make the move first. Because, as I said 6.5 years ago, "One's sense of fair play is somewhat offended by the Tommies superiority over its day to day opponents in the MIAC." And, since then, it's gotten worse, including 97-0 worse.

They say that DeLaSalle will never move up no matter how many Class AAA basketball championships they win, because those championships translate directly into dollars and cents in donations. Similarly, a 97-0 football loss probably has the opposite effect on fund-raising from alumni and the so-called philanthropic community, which is to say, old guys who definitely don't lean toward underdogs.

So, what really makes sense to me is that this was not fundamentally about sports. Of course, the MIAC was its own worst enemy. I mean, I think they said it was about competitive equity. They couldn't really come right out and admit it was about money. It was and is about survival. Because, well, as Borzi reported, "Don't be surprised if an MIAC school closes or merges with another in the next ten years." The cost of education is skyrocketing and, as a result, it is feared that the number of kids going to college could decline and soon. And, those who do go to college are already voting with their wallets (that is, their loan portfolios) for business schools and engineering and everything except the liberal arts. So, some liberal arts colleges are struggling, and some will be closing--again, soon.

So, you're the president of such a university. Maybe your bread and butter is your law school and then, one day, St. Thomas says, we're gonna open a law school. Or, your bread and butter is a nursing school and then, one day, St. Thomas says, we're gonna open a nursing school. Or, for that matter, your the "sister-school" to St. Thomas and one day they say, We're gonna go coed.

At that point, St. Thomas is no longer a friendly competitor. Not off the field. Not on the field. And people have the nerve to say, if you can't beat St. Thomas, well, you just gotta get better. Sports cliches. Dumb jock cliches. A lot of these schools don't have two nickels to rub together, and you think they should take money out of the classrooms to make their football team better? Wow.

And then, on top of all of that, there's 84-0 and 97-0. Sorry. I always liked underdogs, and I am so sympathetic to those 7 or 9 presidents who said, if St. Thomas stays, we're leaving. Much of course was made of the fact that St. Thomas was a founder of the MIAC about 100 years ago. Well, it was about 6 years after that that Carleton was winning everything. They were beating Big 10 teams in basketball and football. They were winning everything. And, so, they left to go play tougher competition. (Of course, the massive irony is that at that time that meant moving to the Midwest Conference of Beloit and Grinnell and Knox and Ripon who, some of you will recognize are now the conference that Macalester has joined in football because it's looking for weaker competition.) Well, things change. Carleton is now back in the MIAC. And just because St. Thomas was there 100 years ago at the founding doesn't mean it's the right conference for them anymore.

Now, before I continue, I have to say. There are people at St. Thomas, and you know their names, who know I've always been a supporter of Tommies athletics. But, I'm just sayin.' It was time to move on. St. Thomas would be no better and no worse off if it had been the one to initiate the change,  but the MIAC would be better off if it had.

And, So, the Future

As I said back in 2013, Marquette's got nothing that St. Thomas hasn't got. Except a football team. Oh, and a hockey team. Still, St. Thomas is gonna be better than Marquette at everything except men's and women's basketball by year 5 in D1. Men's and women's basketball, maybe year 10. The problem is that being better than Marquette in football is not a good measure because, again, they ain't got one.

So, anyway, St. Thomas has been invited into the Summit League and everybody I know at St. Thomas wants to go that way. The Summit League is North Dakota, North Dakota State, South Dakota, South Dakota State, Omaha, Oral Roberts, Denver, Fort Wayne and Western Illinois.

The Tommies need a waiver from the NCAA to go directly from D3 to D1. Nobody's ever done it. The NCAA says it should be a 12-14 year process. Seriously? Then jumping directly must be impossible. Except nobody thinks it's impossible. What's impossible is how the hell anybody came up with 12 to 14 years! So, even St. Thomas folks says it's 50-50 at best that they're gonna get that waiver. But, if they do, they'll do fine in the Summit. Not as in winning 70 percent of the titles but as in winning 10 percent, which would be their fair share. In 10 years, maybe more. They'll do fine.

Except the Summit doesn't do football or hockey. So several Summit schools already play football in the Pioneer and/or the Missouri Valley. The Pioneer, which does not give football scholarships, includes Drake, Butler and Valpo. The MVC, which does, includes 3 of the Dakota teams. So maybe you start in the Pioneer and, if it goes well, move up?

In hockey, 7 teams are leaving the WCHA after 2021--Mankato, Bemidji, Bowling Green, Ferris, Lake Superior, Michigan Tech and Northern Michigan. Perfecto mundo. Meanwhile, the Lady Tommies hockey team is having discussions with the WCHA which still consists of Minnesota, Wisconsin, Ohio State, Mankato, Bemidji, UMD and St. Cloud. So hockey, not a problem.

As I said 6.5 years ago, football--specifically, scholarship football--is the one really big nut in moving to D1. So start out in the Pioneer, and all the rest is doable.

Still it's hard to escape the feeling that the D3 Wisconsin Intercollegiate Athletic Conference (WIAC) isn't a better fit. The WIAC is nothing like the MIAC. It is all of the UW satellite campuses--more like Mankato, St. Cloud, Duluth, Bemidji, etc. Compared to the MIAC it is bigger schools with bigger athletic budgets, better facilities, better coaches, better programs, and utterly unafraid to compete with St. Thomas. They are said to be more than willing to accept St. Thomas as a member. If that happened, the Tommies could keep on playing St. John's every year--and I mean St. John's (Collegeville). So, if, in the end, that NCAA waiver isn't forthcoming, well, that just might be a gift that keeps on giving.

But, if it is, then St. Thomas is going to do just fine. In fact, I'll go one better. In about 25 years, I would expect to see St. Thomas moving into the Big East.





Yet Another Look at St. Thomas

I can't help but notice that over the past month or two a post entitled "The Tommies Are Back" has been my most-read post. I have no idea why that would be. It's a post from 2010 and it's about the St. Thomas men's and women's teams concerning their progress in the 2010 season.

I can't help but think that readers think it's gonna be about the more recent St. Thomas controversies--their exclusion from the MIAC and their efforts at going D1 that are ongoing as we speak. So I've taken 2 posts and put them up here at the top of the blog. One is from way back in 2013, when I said that St. Thomas really should move up. Dominating the MIAC like they had done over the previous quarter-century just didn't seem like a particularly sporting proposition at that time. Then in 2019, I wrote about the fact that the Tommies were and are now trying to move up to D1, if the NCAA will let them.

Please take a look at these 2 articles (below). Some very smart people have told me they're pretty good. And don't get me wrong. I love St. Thomas. And, yet, I don't share the fairly common view that the MIAC should be ashamed and/or the MIAC is cowardly or whatever for compelling St. Thomas to leave the MIAC. The simple fact that they are one of the founders of the conference 100 years ago is irrelevant. The University of Chicago was a founder of the Big 10. So what? My own opinion in 2013 was that St. Thomas should move up at least to D2. My opinion today is that the MIAC did them a favor, and St. Thomas will absolutely thrive at D1--again, if the NCAA let's them in. I mean, what does Marquette have that St. Thomas doesn't have? The answer is, Nothing, and on top of that, St. Thomas has got football, which Marquette ain't got.

St. Thomas is gonna be fine.

So, anyway, if you're looking for some thoughts about St. Thomas as it moves up in the world, these are the articles you want to see, not that one from 2010. Cheers!

Time for St. Thomas to Move On Up!?

Random thoughts while watching the St. Thomas men demolish St. John's 94-63 in a game in which everyone agreed that St. John's played well....

90 years ago Carleton was the powerhouse of Minnesota small college athletics. After 6 straight MCC (the forerunner of the MIAC) basketball titles and similar success in football, Carleton went in search of tougher competition, joining the Midwest Conference featuring schools like Coe and Beloit and Grinnell. It would be about 50 years before the Knights would come back to the MIAC, their glory years by then far in the rear-view mirror.

Today it is St. Thomas that is the 800-pound gorilla of Minnesota small college athletics. In basketball, the Tommies men have won or shared 7 straight conference titles and won a total of 31 such titles, 8 more than anybody else, through the years. They're 71-3 in the conference since 2006, and St. Thomas won the national title in 2011.

The Tommies women, meanwhile, have won 13 MIAC titles, tying with St. Ben's for the most in conference history. They've won 2 straight, and made the NCAA D3 Final Four last year.

And so it goes, in sport after sport after sport.

Men's Sports

Baseball--31 conference titles, #1 all-time in the MIAC, with 9 in a row and a 224-36 record in the 21st century.

Cross-Country--24 titles, #1

Ice Hockey--28 titles, #1

Indoor Track--27 titles, #1. Oh, and the MIAC has had indoor track competition for, ah, 27 years. The Tommies are 27-for-27.

Outdoor Track--29 titles, #1, including 24 of the past 29.

Then there's football (16 titles, #4, but 3 in a row and national runner-up this past fall), Golf (9 titles, #4), Swimming (10 titles, #4), Soccer (6 titles, #4) and Tennis (9 titles, #7). In only Soccer and Tennis has there not been a title in the 21st century.

Women's Sports

Cross-Country--15 titles, #1

Indoor Track--24 titles, #1, 12 in a row and 24 of 27 overall

Outdoor Track--27 titles, #1, 7 in a row and 27 of 30

Softball--17 titles, #1, 10 of the past 12

Volleyball--13 titles, #1

Golf--8 titles #2

Hockey--2 titles, #2

Tennis--1 title, #3

Soccer--4 titles, #4

Swimming--no titles

Enrollment

Then there's the fact that St. Thomas has almost twice the enrollment of the MIAC's next largest universities with 6,800 undergraduate students (plus another 4,000 graduate students, but for athletic purposes, they don't count). Next best are St. Catherine's at 3,800 and Bethel at 3,500. Granted, this is a little misleading, as St. Kate's enrollment is 97 percent women, so  for women, St. Thomas is the 2nd largest. For men, it is the largest by a good margin with about 3,300. St. John's has just 1,900. It and Bethel are pretty close for #2.

St. Thomas 6,300 undergraduates (plus 4,000 graduate students)
St. Catherine's 3,800 undergrads (mostly women)
Bethel 3,500 (plus 3,000 graduate students)
Augsburg 3,200 (plus 900)
St. Olaf 3,200
Concordia (Moorhead) 2,600
Gustavus 2,500
St. Ben's 2,100 (all women)
Carleton, Hamline, Macalester, St. Mary's about 2,000 (St. Mary's has 3,200 grad students, Hamline 2,900)
St. John's 1,900 (all men)

Concordia (St. Paul) (D2) for comparison 1,700

Show Me the Money

Then there's the little matter of money, as measured by the endowment funds. These are a big help with facilties, for example. Is it a coincidence that St. Thomas and Macalester have shiny new basketball arenas?

Macalester $665 million (acc. to US News)
Carleton $645 million (acc. to the school)
St. Thomas $335 (acc. to US News), $408 (acc. to the school), $557 (acc. to Wikipedia)
St. Olaf $327 (the school), $345 (US News and Wikipedia)

St. John's $144 (US News)
Gustavus $109 (US News)
Concordia (Moorhead) $83 (US News)
Hamline $76 (US News, Wikipedia)
St. Kate's $55 (US News)
St. Mary's $45 (US News)
St. Ben's $45 (US News), $38 (Wikipedia)
Augsburg $33 (US News)
Bethel $25 (US News)

Concordia (St.Paul) for comparison $22 (US News)

MIAC + Concordia St. Paul Average: Enrollment 2,600 Endowment $195M

Comparables

Who is St. Thomas like? The following are all Roman Catholic affiliated. All are D1 in basketball. Many do not have football.

St. Thomas 6,300 undergrad enrollment, classified as a National University and rated #113 in its class, with an endowment of $400 to $500 million

Chicago Loyola 9,800 National University #106, $388 million
Boston College 9,000 National U #31, 1,756M
St. Louis 8,600 National U #92, $880M
Marquette 8,400, National U #83, $400M
Georgetown 7,600, National U #21, $1,162M
Duquesne 5,600 National U #120, $171M
St. Joseph's 5,500, Regional U #8, $173M
Seton Hall 5,100 National U #131, $232M
Xavier 4,500 Regional University #4, $120M
LaSalle 4,500 Regional U #41, $73M
Creighton 4,150 Regional U #1, $300M
Providence 3,850 Regional U #4, $165M
Holy Cross 2,900 National Liberal Arts College #32, $600M

Average D1 Basketball, Not Football: 5,750 enroll, or about 500 less than St. Thomas. $360M endow, or about 10 percent less than St. Thomas.

Not So Comparable

If you narrow it down to private schools that play D1 football, you find that St. Thomas is not very comparable, specifically as it relates to $$$, with schools like these:

Notre Dame 8,500 National U #17, $6.4B
Duke 6,700, National U #8, $5.7B
Northwestern 8,500, National U #12, $5.5B
Stanford 7,000, National U #6, $16.5 B
USC 17,500, National U #24, $3.5B

There are a few other private schools that play D1 football--SMU, TCU, BYU--but not many.

Average D1 Football: 11,600 enroll, not quite twice as many as St. Thomas, and a multi billion dollar endowment ($7.5B), or about 20X more than St. Thomas.

What About Division 2?

So if St. Thomas wants to play football, Division 1 is a stretch. But what about Division 2? Here are some Division 2 private schools with football programs.

Bellarmine 3,100 Regional Universities 11, $42M
Dallas Baptist 3,500 Regional U 50, $34M
Drury 2,100 Regional U 11, $66M
Hillsdale 1,300 National Liberal Arts college 96, $312M
Lewis 4,500, Regional U 35, $40M
Mary 2,800, Regional U 105, $34M
Maryville 3,400 National Liberal Arts 161, $34M
Rockhurst 3,000, Regional U 21, $33M
St. Joseph's IN 1,000, Regional U 27, $20M
St. Mary's TX 4,500 Regional U 20, $126M
William Jewell 1,000 National Liberal Arts 140, $65M

Concordia (St. Paul) 1,700, $22M

Average D2 with football: Enroll 2,750, less than half of St. Thomas. Endow only about $80M, or about 20 percent of St. Thomas.

Summary

St. Thomas is an odd duck. It is a Roman Catholic private school that plays football (along with other sports) in D3. Compared to its peers on these criteria, St. Thomas:

• Has a larger enrollment
• And has a lot more money than its peers

Compared to its peers regardless of classification (Roman Catholic and of its general size and wealth), St. Thomas:

• Plays football

If St. Thomas were to move up to D1 or D2, it:

• In D1, it would have many peer schools that do not play football. But if it wanted to play D1 football, there is virtually no model of "comparable" schools based on size and wealth that play football.

• In D2, the schools that are comparable to St. Thomas (private schools of similar size that play football), their peers would have lower academic ratings on average and much lower endowments. There is virtually no school that is truly comparable to St. Thomas playing football in D2.

This is not to say that St. Thomas is not free to forge a new path, one that few other schools have chosen. But there are in fact 4 private schools in the Northern Sun Conference already. St. Thomas would hardly be the first.

Concordia St. Paul--Regional University # 93, enrollment 1,700, endowment $22M
Augustana--Regional University #3, enrollment 1,800, endowment $53M
Sioux Falls--Regional U #32, enrollment 1,500, endowment $20M
Upper Iowa--Regional U Tier 2, enrollment 5,700, endowment $9M

Still it is hard to see how St. Thomas' prestige would be enhanced by an affiliation with these schools rather than the Carletons and Gustavuses and Macalesters of the world. The next most logical conference affiliation might be the Great Lakes Valley Conference, Western Division. which includes:

Drury
Maryville
Quincy
Rockhurst
William Jewell

These would be much more prestigious than than, well, 3 of the 4 privates in the Northern Sun, but the travel would be vastly greater than in the MIAC or NSIC.

Conclusion

Still, the competitive issues remain substantial. Sure, it's great from the Tommies perspective to be successful. But for the rest of the MIAC members, frankly, St. Thomas' obvious superiority has to be a pain in the butt. Or does it? The fact is that MIAC members derive some prestige from their association with St. Thomas, both from an overall perspective and from an athletic perspective.

So on one side, one's sense of fair play is somewhat offended by the Tommies superiority over its day-to-day opponents in the MIAC. But it is almost impossible to construct an alternative model wherein it makes sense for St. Thomas to be in D1 or D2. Not what I set out to discover, frankly. But on a closer look, an inescapable conclusion.

St. Thomas, you have my blessing to stay D3 in the MIAC. (Which I am sure must be a vast relief to all you Tommies out there.)